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Newsletter #10: Fairness in Love & Marriage

Announcing:
"The Doctor's In,"
a new blog written by Jane,
located at JaneShure.com/blog
&
Calming Your Inner Critic
a one day workshop with Beth & Jane
April 25 in Bryn Mawr, PA
See details for early registration discount

We at Selmatters.org...

Want you to know about a new and useful resource for couples:

Try to See It My Way: Being Fair in Love and Marriage

B. Janet Hibbs, PhD with Karen Getzen, PhD wrote:

This book is a practical guide for anyone in a couple relationship. Dr. Hibbs and Dr. Getzen posit that almost all relationship problems - money, kids, chores, sex, in-laws - come down to one word :. Fairness. This book offers practical advice and breaks down the barriers to closeness by helping couples develop new skills for relating fairly. The authors find that couples can solve most relationship problems if they learn to evaluate their old assumptions about "what's fair."

Drs. Hibbs and Getzen believe that fairness, is the key to solving problems and making love last. They point out that while we intuitively think we know what's fair, as partners, we disagree, sometimes chronically. In this book one learns about the two common fairness mistakes people make and how to understand the assumptions about love that get in the way of relating.

In reading this book, couples can learn how to recover from unfair treatment and strengthen their relationships. The book offers a refreshing new approach to understanding the root cause of conflicts, and shows how to make love thrive.

Try to See It My Way addresses four crucial fairness conflicts and shows how couples can heal from:
  • Loyalty Conflicts: when one is pulled to take sides
  • Everyday Abuses of Fairness: the little things that partners do to drive each other crazy
  • Growing Pains of Marriage: deciding what's fair when it comes to money, chores, kids and sex.
  • Enduring Injustices: the deal-breakers of affairs, addiction and ongoing mistreatment.
This book is helpful for anyone who's ever felt unfairly treated by a partner and can help the reader cope with feelings of injustice, develop a new way of relating, and build a more balanced and loving relationship.


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